Only the Courageous POST!

Well, I know it has been a long time since I placed anything up here, but I have to say I have been thinking too much rather than writing. Mainly because thinking about what to write is so much harder than just typing out your thoughts. If that makes any sense.

I have been thinking about the "blog" generation. See, when I first was introduced to the web it actually had a yellow pages of all the sites you could visit. And it wasn't as thick as the yellow pages for the telephone. NO, I am not from the stone age! Believe it or not it was just a few years ago.

Anyway, I am in the "computer" generation and it has blown up before my eyes. I know that almost everything is computerized, and I have seen it evolve.

Today's Web 2.0 leaves few secrets to anyone. You can log onto facebook, myspace, or even just google the person you wish. At your fingertips comes a truckload of information. Who needs a private investigator when you have the world wide web.

All of these personalized sites are a window into someone's life. If you think you aren't being tracked or watched, you are mistaken. I am not saying that everyone online is being investigated I am just stating that your life is exposed to all that try to access it.

Getting to my point. Blogs are a window into the lives of all that you share it with. Sometimes you need to be careful what you say or how you type something because it is there. Written. In plain type. I guess that is why it has took me so long to write again, I need to find the ability to just write, again. I over analyze things too much sometimes. It comes with the job.

I leave you with this, in an world of "Gossip Girls" be aware of what you say, I mean type.

Sensitive?

OK I know this is weird to say, but I think I'm what they call a "sensitive." I have had premonitions for so long I can't even count the number of times. I have had feelings about people that I have never met before only to learn that my feelings had validation.

I know it sounds so weird. It sounds that to me. I don't know how to explain it except that every time I read about the psychic ability I get a feeling that I belong. It is not crazy like I see dead people" or anything. I just get these feelings about things and let me tell you I am usually right. If not all the time. Even when I start to doubt my feelings about people I find out months down the road that I was right all along.

I have had feelings about friends, family, even pets. Is that strange?

I seem to always know when someone is about to pass or as they say "cross over."
One instance is: I was up at college, and I had a dream. (It usually starts there) I dreamt that I was in a house with my mom, dad and some of my other family, I remember being in a room waiting. I had a very sad feeling come across me. Suddenly a man came in in wearing a white coat and smiling. He had a leash in his hands. At the end of that leash was my dog, Biscuit. Biscuit was younger, strong, and almost had a smile on his face. We were all gathered in this room to say goodbye. I didn't understand why, but I said goodbye. After we all hugged him and wished him well, the man in the white coat walked him up the stairs of the house we were in. Both of them looked happy as if they were walking up with purpose.
after I awoke I was so filled with this loss that I was hysterical crying, saying he died. My boyfriend at the time, now husband, held me and was repeating over and over that's it's ok. I couldn't shake this feeling, like he was already gone. I waited till morning and called my mother who was home in New York at the time. She said that Biscuit was still here. He wasn't doing well at the time, but he was the same as he had been. I still felt that I needed to go home. The very next day I drove home. He was there. I thought I was crazy. That night I went out and when I came home, Biscuit was at the door panting very hard. I felt that feeling all over again.
At that moment, I said goodbye to him. I don't know why but I did. I told him that I loved him, he was my best friend. I was an only child, and he was a friend that was always there for me. Loved me, no matter what was going on in my life. Maybe you have to be an only child to explain that feeling.
The next day he was gone.

I also have had a dream that my grandfather died. I was so overwhelmed by this that I felt like I needed to tell him how I felt before it was too late. My grandfather wasn't an easy man to get along with. He was always blaming someone for things that were broken or things missing. He was a character to say the least, but I knew what he felt inside. None of my other cousins could see it or feel it. I knew. I knew he was a good man. He loved, he cared, maybe in ways that they weren't used to, but I knew he loved me. Anyway, I wrote him a letter inside a card. I never did that with him. I needed to say all the things I never said. I don't know what compelled me to do this, but if there is anything I learned, it is if you feel it then do it.

My grandfather got the card, and my grandmother said that he loved it and he cried. He never cried over anything. I have never seen this man give a hug, or show affection to anyone in public. That is just how he was. I knew that about him, and I knew what he felt inside, so it didn't bother me to need that validation.

On my grandmother's birthday that year my grandfather had a heart attack and died. My family was asking me as if I knew this was going to happen. Then that went away.

One year later to the day I had another experience. This time I got the you know what scared out of me.

On that day I had been arguing with my parents. The same as any normal teenager would. Except this time, something was different. I had gotten so mad that I went into my room and shut the door behind me. I sat in front of my closet door and started to cry. All of a sudden I heard a voice that said'"I don't think so." I immediately jumped up and my heart was racing. I thought I was going crazy. I ran downstairs and my parents were there. I didn't even care how mad I was or what we were arguing about. They saw the look of fear on my face. So I asked them, "Did either of you just say the words I don't think so," thinking I had heard it through the vent.

They both looked at me and said, no. My father then turned around and said that is what your grandfather used to say all the time.

I didn't know how to react so I kinda just brushed it off and said whatever, I must be crazy.

I went on doing the things I normally would do. I went to go meet my friend at her job, when I got a page. (Yes, a beeper, at the time that was the only form of communication when someone was out.) I called the number back and it was my aunt telling me that my father was rushed to the hospital. He was having a heart attack. What?

The exact same day, on my grandmother's birthday, that my grandfather had his heart attack, my father was having one himself. Was it also a coincidence that I heard my grandfather's voice that very night?

All I thought of was that voice, "i don't think so." Was my grandfather trying to tell me something?

it just seems that every time I get a feeling about someone or something. It turns out to be true. I always seem to have such symbolic and vivid dreams that I always remember, while other people do not remember anything in their dreams.

I have had buffalo telling me not to take a certain path in a dream, then when I awake I know not to go down a certain road.

I have had numerous feelings about people, that I don't always understand, but get validated days or even months later. I tend to trust me feelings now, even if I don't understand them at the time.

My dream confuse me, and can sometimes thrill me. What does it all mean?

I recently discovered that these feelings have some justification. You can believe or choose not to. These people that have this intuition are called sensitives. They are not psychics, in the "tarot-reading" sense, but are more intertwined with there senses and feelings.

There is a quiz that I saw on about.com that I seemed to answer "yes" to all of the questions. Take the quiz see if you answer yes to any of the questions, or just write back on your thoughts and feelings on the subject. I welcome them all.
Here is the quiz: http://healing.about.com/cs/uc_directory/a/uc_sensitives_j.htm

The Contemporary Woman - Mia Michaels

con•tem•po•rary:

happening, existing, living, or coming into being during the same period of time

According to Wikipedia, Contemporary dance has certain principles. They are Centering, Alignment, Gravity, Breath, Contraction, Release, Fall and Recovery, Spension, Balance and Off-Balance, Tension and Relaxation, Opposition and Emotion.

In other words contemporary dance is Mia Michaels. Mia is an Emmy Winning Choreographer, but it is not this statue that appeals her talent to me. I had first seen Mia's work on Fox's Network show, "So You Think You Can Dance." I was stunned, amazed and pleasantly surprised. I felt like I was looking into the soul of someone.

Mia Michaels expresses such emotion in her performances. The way the dancer's bodies intertwine and wrap around each other and then explode open with such force. Meanwhile, the dancers look like it is a natural motion of body movement.

She also, seems to push the dancers to explore more than just technique, but to also feel the music. Get inside the dance and explore the emotion.

Every time I see one of her dances I can see and feel the story. It is such a change to have an artist of this genre to be able to be seen in a medium of massive proportions. I love waiting to see what she will come up every week. Even the dancers seem to share this privilege. Each time a dancer on the show picked Mia Michaels, they knew they were getting a winner.

I am anticipating the return of the new series as well as the performances by Mia Michaels. However, we have to give a huge amount of credit to the other choreographers on the show. I love watching all of their performances as well. I loved, The foxes, the hummingbird, the stomp, the business meeting... I can keep going. What can I say, this is a great show. No, I am not a crazy fan, just in case you were wondering. I just like, what I like.

I would encourage everyone to at least check it out. Make your own opinion. It premieres tonight, Thursday, May 22nd. Then every Thursday night after that. Of course the beginning is just the tryouts, but that can be the funniest part of the show!

Dance your heart out.

Photo:MiaMichaels.com

David Cook RULES!!!!

I know it seems pretty lame to say I am watching American Idol, yet again, but can I express how much David Cook rules!!!!

I watched last season and I loved Chris Daughtry. I have a think for the rockers. I always said it almost better not to win the American Idol, but to come in second, third, etc...

Although I hope that David Cook wins this season. 

He has such a following already. This past week he went home to soooo many people he could already fill a concert stadium. I love his vocals. He makes each song unique, even when it has been played out on the radio already.

Don't get me wrong, there is a lot of talent that surrounds the idols stage, however, the rockers hold a special place in my heart. I can't wait till each week when he sings again, just like I can't wait till Chris Daughtry's new album comes out.

I do have a complaint. American Idol is going crazy advertising the contestants songs on iTunes. However, all the songs in the show are not available for download! WTF! I couldn't wait to download the full version of all Davis Cook's songs. Yet, they pick one song to record in the studio and the rest are a minute and a half of their performances on video. And the still charge a $1.99 for the same 90 seconds whereas, I have a full song for 99 cents. What is up with that!

LISTEN. I love iTunes. No one can compare to that medium of video and audio. I encourage everyone to go to iTunes and get all the music and video you want. They have a plethora of it. 

All that I am saying is, make all of it available. I am sure that they get a piece of that pie, so why not make the entire pie available instead of just a slice at a time. I am hungry for more, so give me more!

Ok, enough geekdome about the most 'pop' show on tv.

I had to get that off my chest.

The First Blog EVER!

Well, it's about time to pop the cherry on this virgin blogger. Needless to say, this is my first blog. "Welcome to the Web 2.0."

First, I have to give a big "Thanks for the Inspiration" to Amanda and Amy. You are both my inspiration for this blog. I have had sooo much fun reading your blogs that I felt inspired to  join the community.

You are probably wondering why I called my blog "T.M.I." It seems to many people that I have a habit of seeing the line to cross, and then jumping way passed it. To me it is just being honest. I guess to others it could be a little more info than they wanted, hence the name:T.M.I.

Anyway, on with the blog....

I have to talk about my favorite show in the world, LOST! I absolutely love this show, even though it seems to always find a way to give us more questions than answers. I love the mystery of figuring out the clues from week to week. I guess I'm a detective at heart.

This past week was one of the best episodes ever, "Cabin Fever." Whenever, Locke seems to have an episode with flashbacks (or forwards, now) it gives us a more in-depth look at what might be going on. Locke might be the new Ben, Ben might be Locke's dad, Ben may never age, Locke may be "the one", it is all very confusing.

In a way I can't wait to see the end to get answers to all the looming questions, but I do not want to see the show go. Since today is Thurs, and LOST will be on tonight I am sure that new questions shall emerge and no questions will have definitive answers.

I know this is a pretty weak first blog. However, I am looking forward to many more chats with my keyboard and maybe some of the people who may come across it.